Drowning
by MoiraCPercy
Summary: Another reunion story. How the reunion would have happened, had Peeta not been hijacked.


**AN* This is my version of the reunion scene. I know it's been done many times before, but I wanted to write my own version. ****It's short, but I hope you like it... at least more than I do. :)**

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Drowning

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Haymitch and I stand outside the door to his room, staring at it as if waiting for it to vanish. My heart is racing, breaking between fear and joy. I can barely help the fearful hesitation I feel as I place my hand on the cool door knob- that same hesitation I felt so many times before with Peeta. I'm so afraid that'll I'll open the door to an empty room; to a supply closet as I wake from another nightmare. My mind is splitting between the risk of actually believing he's right inside- only a few feet away- and the harsh belief that he could still be gone, lost.

I want to believe it. I want to believe it more than anything, but my mind is screaming at me, warning me that I'll only be disappointed. I try to push it away, but as the joy I've been trying to suppress begins to crash its way through, I realize that I don't really care if I'm disappointed. I don't care if I'm dreaming. I don't care if I wake up to realize it's all been a lie, because at least I'll have this moment. This one last moment with Peeta- to hear his voice, see his smile. To see everything that I've been missing since the arena. What else do I have to lose, anyway?

My throat tightens, and for a split second I almost feel like I know what I want. But it vanishes before I can think about it any longer, and in that split second my hand turns the knob.

I stand frozen as the door slowly opens. Haymitch stands at my side, silent as he holds his breath. In front of us is a trio of doctors swarmed around a bed in the middle of the room. For a horrible second, I'm back on the hovercraft in the first arena as the doctors worked to keep Peeta alive, the surgical wear so foreign in appearance that I had thought they were mutts there to kill him. I fight back the impulse to lung at them, my hands fisting at my sides as I try to calm my fear.

I take a deep breath, my heart picking up for an entirely different reason now, because I'm fairly certain I just saw a head of blonde hair through the gap between the doctors. My eyes widen, the reality of the situation finally crushing down on me like a ton of bricks. He's here. He's actually here. An overwhelming surge of emotions crashes over me in waves- shock, amazement, joy, relief- so many that my head feels like it's spinning, and I have to grab on to Haymitch's arm to keep my balance. He doesn't mind, just smiles down at me, his lips in a crooked grin as he tries to hide his own emotions.

For the first time, the doctors seem to notice our presence. They back away, exchanging looks as they slowly leave the room, whispering a quick word in Haymitch's ear. I barely pay any attention because there, in front of me, Peeta sits on the bed. His eyes are wide in disbelief, his face pale. He leans to one side, favoring the left, on arms and legs that are thinner then when I last saw him. My eyes scan the rest of him- the bruises on his skin, the skinniness of his once muscular body- before resting on his eyes.

My breathing seems to stop. Because for the first time in months, I see those bright blue eyes that I've grown so used to, that I've grown to look forward to without realizing. I almost drop to the floor in relief. And suddenly there's tears falling down my cheeks, my throat closing as the weight of everything around me seems to fall. I take a shaky step forward, and at the same time, I see the same realization hit Peeta.

"Katniss?" He asks, his voice rough, hesitant with disbelief.

A hysterical laugh bubbles out if me at the sound of his voice. "Peeta." I choke out, my body finally catching up with my brain as I run the short distance to him, crashing into his chest.

Automatically, his arms wrap tightly around me, pulling me impossibly closer to him. I bury my face in the crook of his neck, breathing in the scent of him- that ridiculously intoxicating scent of cinnamon and dill- drowning in the scent. My tears stain his cotton t-shirt, my hands buried in the curls of his hair. I gasp for air, chocking in tears, and the pain of my chest compressing. I just want to leave, to take Peeta with me and never go back. I want to keep him with me, as mine. I want to drown away in his embrace... I want so much that only he can give me. His smile, his light, his spirit. Everything I can't get with anyone else.

The realization hits me so hard that I pull away, his arms still around me. I look up at his face to see his own tears. To see the look of love so plainly exposed. His eyes search mine as he reaches up to grab the end of my braid, running it gently between his fingers. Slowly, he shakes his head, closing his eyes tightly as he pulls me closer again. Before I can help it, my hand rests gently on his cheek, wiping away the tears as they continue to fall. My mind is reeling, and all I can do is scoot in closer, letting the heat of him surround me.

"They told me you died," he whispers in my ear, his voice pained.

More tears fall from my eyes, and I grab the front of his shirt in a fist, pulling him closer still. "I'm here. I promise I'm here."

A chocked sob escapes his throat. "I don't want you to go."

"I'm not going anywhere." I say, my throat tight, knowing that I mean every word I say.

He leans back to look in my eyes, his own desperately pleading with me. "I can't lose you again. I can't make that mistake a second time." His face crumbles. "Oh, please God, tell me this is real."

"It's real, Peeta. It's so real."

He searches my eyes again, barely daring to believe it. "They told me that before, and it wasn't real." He says quietly.

"I promise this is real." I say, "I'm here, and I won't leave you. Not again."

I stare at the circles under his eyes, the torture and shadows that cloud his once bright face. "I'm sorry, Peeta. I'm so sorry." I blamed Haymitch for losing what was precious to me, but I was the one who let him slip through my fingers. I was stupid.

Peeta rests his forehead against mine, his body and mind exhausted. "I know you won't want to hear this," he whispers, "but I have to tell you anyway." He stares right into my eyes, and I feel myself freeze from the intensity of emotions swirling in them. "I love you so much, Katniss. You have no idea." He says, his voice thick.

And with that, my mind seems to shut down as I feel myself lean in, my lips hesitating millimeters from his. But as they gently brush against his own, warmth spreads throughout me, completely foreign. My hand tightens on his shirt and, before I realize it, I pull him down the rest of the way. Peeta seems just as shocked as I am, for he simple stands there, bewildered until finally he gains his senses, crushing me to him once again. I happily except it, my hands burying further in his hair as my whole body seems to tingle, that same warmth I felt on the beach flowing through me once again.

All around me is Peeta- his scent, his touch, his very being- and I gladly drown in it. We pull away, a smile forming on my lips for the first time since I can remember. Peeta laughs, his voice loud and ecstatic. But the moment ends when he groans, sagging against me slightly as he tries to stay on his feet. I quickly help him back to his bed, laying him down on his pillow as I pull the covers over him. The circles under his eyes seem to darken and I bite my lip, realizing I shouldn't have let him get up in the first place.

"Are you okay?" I ask, watching as his face contorts in pain.

He nods, cracking an eye open to see me. "I'm okay, just sore." He says through gritted teeth.

"I should call the doctor."

He shakes his head. "No doctors." He says, "I've had enough needles."

"Peeta..." I say, unsure of what to do.

He scoots over on the bed, lifting the covers up as he invites me in. For a brief second I consider declining, knowing that both of us would barely fit, meaning I would just aggravate his pain. But then in remember that he was the one being torture and abused in the Capitol, and if he wants this, I won't refuse him. Besides, there's a small part of me- the selfish part- that's been waiting for this for too long. So I scoot in with him, pressing against his side as gently as possible.

Curling up against his side, I feel myself relax, transported back to those many nights on the train when Peeta was the only thing keeping me sane. This is how it should have stayed, this is how it should have happened to begin with. He kisses my forehead- whispering a half conscious 'I love you' under his breath- as his breathing slows and he drifts off to sleep. I realize what I want now. And what I want is to live in this moment forever, and never to leave. To always have the light that can't seem to ever fade.

And only Peeta can give me that. It's taken me years to realize, since that day he threw me the bread, to know what he's known all along. That no matter what, that no matter who we meet or what we go through, there is only him. I push away all rational thought telling me I'll only be hurt, and for the first time listen to the voice in the back of my head telling me it's worth it; that this is supposed to happen.

So, as I listen to his steady heartbeat, I whisper, "I love you too, Peeta."

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**There ya have it. Hope you liked it. :)**


End file.
